Comments on: Open Thread: What are some Christians thinking when they justify rudeness with religion?

By: lynne

lynne — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 16:37:11 +0000

Good Grief!…I was just about to make the mistake of trying out waitressing. Thank you all for the warning.
Yeah, group dynamics are tricky aren’t they? Generally, people seem to act badly more so in groups as opposed to individually.
It seems to me that good manners and consideration of others is a result of good up-bringing. I’ve been in the church most of my life and I really haven’t seen a person’s basic tendencies change much after they become a christian. (Oh dear, did I just open that can of worms?)

It’s true that to become a servant of The Most High is the highest position …but also the lowest. Sometimes we forget that we are to become servants to servants also.

Fr Ernesto, I appreciated all your comments.

And I thank everyone for provoking me to get on my knees and thank God for identifying with us in the person of Jesus. Spurring each other on to do better is a good thing and I pray that we can forgive each other as well.

By: Shogun of the South

Shogun of the South — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 01:15:18 +0000

No more can you judge a table of church goers as representing all Christians, than believing that all Muslims are in a jihad…unfortunately the world judges any large group by the 1% that make the headlines.

By: Larry Mayer

Larry Mayer — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 18:36:57 +0000

I am glad that most Christians I know do not behave this way. Most I know are quite generous and go above and beyond the average when it comes to tipping. I realize that there are “religious” folks who get catagorized as Christians but I think it was Jesus that said you would know if they are Christians by the way they act. You can be the judge—-after all, Jesus said we could judge actions, right?

By: Ray A.

Ray A. — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 17:24:37 +0000

I’ve gotten into the habit of tipping 25% or more (unless the service is truly horrific), just as an attempt to make up for the “modern Pharisees” who under-tip or don’t tip at all. Also, I remember working as a busboy before going off to college, back when the minimum wage (which I was making) was $3.50 an hour — I probably made a third of my money from tips. Do unto others …

By: Ky boy but not now

Ky boy but not now — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 23:46:25 +0000

Christopher Lake

“As far as your doing home improvements on Sunday, if youâ€™re not a Sabbatarian, why are you asking me? Why does it matter what I think?”

“About the last question in my comment, itâ€™s asked with a matter-of-fact tone, not an irritated one.”

It was a question asking an opinion of the group, not for you specifically.

Although you did skip over my comments on how using the products of our industrial age is asking someone to work on Sundays. Almost anything made of chemicals, metals, etc… is made of a continuous process these days.

By: Matthew N. Petersen

Matthew N. Petersen — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:35:18 +0000

And I think if I’d overheard people attacking the waitress like that, I’d have chewed them out, and offered to tip her for them. ‘Least I hope I would have.

By: Matthew N. Petersen

Matthew N. Petersen — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:33:24 +0000

Not really on the topic of why people get all self-righteous (like the Jews in the early part of Romans–do you who judge others not rob temples, commit adultery etc.), but it seems to me that tipping extra on Sunday would be a good practice. I mean if you found out your waitress was working on her birthday, wouldn’t you tip extra? So why shouldn’t we say “sorry for making you work on Sunday. Here’s a little extra tip.”

By: GSusGuy

GSusGuy — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 21:04:31 +0000

Here’s a question. How does Christ unite His church when there is such a broad stroke of thoughts and viewpoints on this simple issue?

By: The Scylding

The Scylding — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 20:27:38 +0000

Well, I’m a bit late to this thread, but I would view such behaviours as inherently uncivilised, in addition to the more obvious hypocracy etc. I recently wrote a little series on “Being civilised” at my blog – it does seem that Christians often do not understand this concept. The motivation for such boorishness is difficult to gauge, but as some mentioned here, it could spring from some feeling of entitlement. But in The Screwtape Letters, CS Lewis has a wonderful section on a person who behvaes in such a way – on the one hand proclaiming how little they demand, but on the other being a real pain about it (I only want tea and toast, but the tea must be just right, and the toast just so, otherwise please take it back…). False humilty is horrid pride. It also occurs to me that these people, irrespective of their beliefs, forgot that The Greatest of these is Love.

Side issue: Tipping etiquette differs from place to place – outside N America, it is often only 10%, and varies with quality. The variance I learnt (in Africa) was to tip the ordinary percentage for adequate service, greater than that for good service, smaller than that for lesser service. But always with kindness and understanding. It is possible to voice your displeasure (about reasonable objections, mind you), in a kind way. Don’t be a boor, or a cad, ever.

By: Headless Unicorn Guy

Headless Unicorn Guy — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 01:29:08 +0000

Missed this opening statement of Sue’s first time around:

think sometimes maybe this is part of the problem, this insistence that the Christian life is all about being shiny all the time, instead of acknowledging and accepting the more â€œnegativeâ€ of our emotions? — Sue

Shiny Happy-clappy Christians are just as far out of balance as the Dystopian Crapsack World types, just in the opposite direction. And their Sweet Shininess is surface-shallow, with no strength behind it — what happens when Tash kicks in the door of their Thomas Kincade cottage?

A writer contact in Louisville told me once of hearing Mike Yaconelli (or someone associated with him) pose the question “Have you considered depression to be your spiritual gift?” He spoke of the strong “negative” emotions often being what powered art and writing, giving depth and counterpoint, and how the Shiny Happy-clappy 24/7 image had probably driven the real artists and writers (such as the next C.S.Lewis) away from the church.