November 19, 2017

My Last Post . . . Ever!

Did you order your T-shirt in time?

By Chaplain Mike

After 6pm tomorrow night, I will either be “caught up together with them to meet the Lord in the air” (1Thess 4:17), or so busy dealing with the aftermath of The Global Earthquake that will shake the world, that I will not have time for blogging. And since I have decided not to follow the example of some websites, like Judgement Day 2011, where they have prepared blog posts to run after the big event, I guess this is goodbye.

Wait…If these earthquakes are going to be so devastating, will the internet even work after Saturday evening? Oh well, one way or another I probably won’t care. Nor will you.

And so, as the saints ascend heaven’s stairway and leave the earth in its distress and disarray, there is only one thing left to say…

Comments

  1. I clicked on the link to the Judgement Day 2011 website. It is temporarily out of service. That’s funny! See ya’ll Monday!

    • I clicked on it too, and thought it was hilarious, like they’d been raptured and not us. Then I realized that Chaplain Mike spelled it wrong and the link didn’t work! (but what can we expect from a reprobate?)

      Click on http://judgmentday2011.com/ Equally hilarious. Or tragic.

      • Actually, it does work, and as spelled. I just copied and pasted the name, so it’s their spelling. Must have some folks with British in them who like the old spelling.

        • Or, another alternative, they wanted to be able to witness to both good and bad spellers, so they created sites with both spellings!

          • The Guy from Knoxville says:

            By the way Chaplin Mike……. it would really be a hoot if Michael were still with us and to read his post on this and the podcast to go with it – can you imagine what that would be like – a ROTFLMAO moment I’m sure. I can see him doing the final podcast for those left behind and before hand for those believing they were catching the first cloud to the sky. Might be worth posting a rapture or end times article that Michael wrote if there’s one in the archive that would fit this situation.

        • hmmm. Still doesn’t work for me. I deleted the “e” and then it worked. Could there be two groups like this? Nothing would surprise me.

  2. I have a 7:50 am flight from Madrid to Paris tomorrow (May 21st). Hopefuly the great earthquake will fall while I’m inflight and we can land somewhere safe. I’d like to think that I care about those of you that will be forced to ride things out on terra firma, but frankly, given my premellianist leanings; too bad, too sad.

  3. I’ll take my leave of you all now, because if Mr. Camping is correct and it’s going to hit at 6 p.m. local time, that means I’ll either be transported in the air or left to face the earthquake before the rest of you (except for the Australians and New Zealanders, who’ll be going before any of us, and the continental Europeans, and all those living in Asia, and the rest).

    It’s been wonderful, Chaplain Mike! I’ll miss you all!

  4. This whole thing is just another much to do about nothing event. Like the recent Osama bin Laden incident we will once again have another half million unoriginal Christian bloggers putting their hat in the ring by regurgitating posts like: “I’m still here…what went wrong?” and “Herold Camping: False Prophet”. Snooze. As for myself, I will probably be blogging about ripping the roof off the local church, and my disdain for people who let their dogs crap in my yard. I try to stick with the money topics.

    In the spirit of Christian charity I think we should send Herold Camping some sympathy cards that read: “God is ever faithful…but your math sucks” However, the Jehovah’s Witnesses have predicted the end several times and their buildings are still standing?

    I think Herold’s 15min are about up; after which- I see some serious solo- camping and soul searching in his future ( but wait, is that considered a prediction? God forbid!)

    • Headless Unicorn Guy says:

      Other end-of-the-world movements have had to backpedal after their This Is It date comes and goes. Here are two end time prophecy retrofits (besides the old standby of Spiritualizing the whole thing after-the-fact) that were actually used:

      1) “The World DID End, but Satan hath sent you Strong Delusion that you should believe The Lie.”

      2) “Anyone can make a mistake. Be glad I did!”

  5. cermak_rd says:

    So, when this fails to happen, what’ll go through the true believers’ minds first? Will it be, I wasn’t good enough should have hired rapture fakers, or will it be Harold Camping was WRONG.

    I will be here on Monday of course. Jews don’t get raptured. It sounds way too passionate for us.

    • … what’ll go through the true believers’ minds first?

      What usually goes through their minds — light breezes. >:-)

      (sorry …)

  6. Going home after a rousing Fun Day at school with my students — you haven’t lived til you’ve been down an inflatable waterslide with two senior girls! If that didn’t kill me, then I’m sure I’ll live through the earthquake. Blessings to all and I’ll see y’all on the flip side of either the Rapture or the weekend. Chou!

  7. Wouldn’t it be just like God to have a sense of humor and rapture everyone TODAY?

  8. I am looking forward to Heaven’s porn-free internet.

    • Heaven doesn’t need the Internet — for we shall know fully, just as we are fully known (1 Cor. 13:12). Think about it, no Twitter overloads, no need for anti-virus software, no pop-up ads …

      Having said that, I’m looking forward to continuing my teaching series on grace Sunday — and shaking my head at Harold Camping, professional false prophet. Again.

      • Oh, and no politics! That will be amazing!

      • cermak_rd says:

        You know, in Deuteronomy they had a way of making sure false prophets only disturbed people ONCE.

      • Minor clarification: a false teacher, not false prophet. He did not make his own prophecy, he just claimed to to have interpret prophecies made by others (in the Bible).

    • Brendan H says:

      “I am looking forward to Heaven’s porn-free internet.”

      Even in heaven I’m pretty sure I can get around the filters.

  9. I’ll be listening to REM:
    It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine…

    They even got the time right:
    Six o’clock, TV hour. Don’t get caught in foreign towers…

    • Headless Unicorn Guy says:

      Local morning drive-time talk radio (KFI Los Angeles) on Friday covered the Camping Rapture Scare with their usual snark.

      They were using REM as bumper music between segments.

  10. dumb ox says:

    You should see all those attending the post-rapture looting event on Facebook. It’s pretty hilarious. I’ll be there (Lutherans aren’t invited to the rapture; there’s not enough room on the beam-up site for the beer barrel. 😉 )

    • what about a micro-brew inside a camel back bev. pack ??? Or are there rapture filters for that sort of thing ??

  11. I haven’t read the Camping information closely enough (I guess I’ve got better things to do, like read this blog site) to know how time zones will play into this whole thing. I live in S. Korea, so will we go first? Just wondering.

  12. What a day…. I guess we should just enjoy today and live it up for all we can knowing tomorrow’s fate. How am I going to spend my last night on earth? I’m going to be left behind…I just know it 😛 I’m resigned to that fact (long deep siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh)

    Ah hell….I’m heading to the bar with a few other guys. If you make it to Ballston in the DC suburbs of Virginia drinks are on me I Monestary!!! Oh well when the rapture DOES happen do you think we will finally be spared comments by Pat Robertson?

  13. cermak_rd says:

    I guess we can all be assured of one thing. No where in the US will suffer from anarchy due to the rapture. I’m pretty sure the lawyers and politicians are staying right here!

  14. I’m surprised that mainstream churches aren’t making more of a pitch for the followers here – along the lines of “we will be open for you on Sunday, you aren’t the first to experience this, come and join us in praise.” The Catholic Church has a ceremony for everything, surely there could be a processional scheduled. I actually don’t know what should be said to a disappointed post-Rapture believer. What would you say?

    • JoanieD says:

      Good question, Sue. Some of these people are bound to be discouraged and some may lose what faith in Jesus they had. They need people to remind them that they need to put their faith in Jesus, not in Harold Camping or any other person. Perhaps they can be given some short essays by people who understand the return of Jesus in other ways. And like you said, people should invite them to join them in worship of God. I don’t know if some of these people gave away all that they had. If they did, they will need help with that too. Luckily, they will find some homes going for rock-bottom prices right now!

    • That Other Jean says:

      Maybe “How can I help you get your life back together?”

  15. Just thinking – if the Bible says says *no one* knows the date and the hour, does that mean that Harold Camping’s certainty may have actually FORCED God to scrap His his otherwise-scheduled rapture plan for tomorrow?
    Way to go, Harold.

    • dumb ox says:

      Yes, but Bible didn’t say we wouldn’t know the minute and the second.

      • dumb ox says:

        I said that sarcastically, but someone out there may actually believe that. Can’t be too careful.

  16. Richard McNeeley says:

    I saw Pirates of the Caribbean today, I didn’t want to wait until tomorrow and miss it. Also my wife got a new ring today so she could enjoy it for the next 24 hours, the check won’t clear until Monday and I’ll be gone. Seriously, I look forward to reading everyone’s comments next week.

  17. dumb ox says:

    “If this were the last night of the world
    What would I do?
    What would I do that was different
    Unless it was champagne with you?”
    – Bruce Cockburn

  18. JoanieD says:

    You know, I am not a very good Christian because I could be happy with many scenarios:

    1. When I die, let’s say that is the end of everything for me. No afterlife at all. But while I was alive, I had the chance to live, love and maybe make the world a little better place. And I am happy knowing that God came in the flesh through Jesus and told us that he loves us. He sent the Holy Spirit to us so that we really COULD love our neighbors and our enemies.

    or

    2. When I die, I enter into another dimension some call heaven and I have a spiritual type of “body” something like the angels have. I am in the constant presence of the love of God. Sounds good to me.

    or

    3. We come to what our Christian tradition teaches, that after we die we are with God in some way, but that eventually we will be resurrected with a physical body that is immortal and that is like the body that Jesus had when he resurrected. Heaven and earth are renewed by God and God’s presence is always among us. This third “option” is actually the hardest to understand and I don’t blame people who say “WHAT???” to the whole idea about this. But this is what we as Christians have been taught and what many of us believe. I will feel sad for the people who trusted Harold Camping’s teaching that Jesus would return tomorrow and that many people would be “raptured.” They want to be with Jesus. WE want to be with Jesus. Come, Lord Jesus.

    (I also hope the disappointed folks can learn to see God here on earth in their loved ones, in their worship, in their prayers. They need to know that God is here among us through the Holy Spirit.)

  19. dkmonroe says:

    Well, laugh it up, people, but remember that the Camping organization has taken in $80 million dollars since 2005 to promote this nonsense. That’s $80 million dollars that people have invested in the shipwreck of their faith. It’s not just the money that is at issue, but the money represents the commitment of many to believe absolute futility and to call it Christianity.

    I can’t laugh at it anymore. I just can’t.

    • The Guy from Knoxville says:

      Wonder if Camping will consider returning all that money to the people in his “church” and others who sold it all for this moment only to find that they must go on living out their normal life spans here – they will need funds to live on……. This is the sad part of it.

    • What did P.T. Barnum say?

  20. Will the last person to leave please remember to turn off the lights.

  21. Can’t wait for Jeff’s Saturday Ramblings tomorrow.

  22. What annoys me the most (leaving aside the fact that the Bible’s clear that no-one knows the day or the hour, or the fact that pre-millenialism is only one way of viewing the rapture) is the America-centric attitude that these rapture predictions always have – surely 6pm Jerusalem time, or 6pm at the international date line (either side) 6pm at the meridian where the greatest number of people live (possibly somewhere through Asia or sub-saharan Africa) are much more likely than 6pm in New York, Washington or LA. And why are we even using the Gregorian calendar for these calculations – why not the Julian calendar or whatever the Jewish calendar was?

    If the rapture happens at 6pm my time, it’ll probably be before 6am in the US – maybe not even that depending on where you are. Looks like you guys’ll all have to get up early or prepare yourselves to join in the after rapture looting.

    • Donalbain says:

      According to Camping, it is 6pm everywhere. The earth quakes will follow local time.

      • Bledsoe says:

        In that case, we sinners can escape retribution by legally declaring a new legislative day, or something to that effect. (Like the Pacific island that voted to shift to the other side of the International Date Line.)

      • Headless Unicorn Guy says:

        According to Camping, it is 6pm everywhere. The earth quakes will follow local time.

        So his secret Bible Code calculations pointed him to “The Rapture Wave Effect”?

        (“Rapture Wave” was a series of GrimDark fanfics at the Left Behind deconstruction site “Right Behind” whose “what if?” was “What if the Rapture comes in a wave all over the world, with the rising sun?” Good horror in the idea that after sunrise in Jerusalem, everyone else could See It Coming (and react) over the next 24 hours as sunrise swept over the world and “took all the children”. Some of these fics went into some seriously dark horror as people reacted in various ways to What Was Coming.)

    • Well, its 11 AM here now, and so far nada. I’m thinking its gonna be like following Santa around the world on the NORAD site. So I’m not panicked because there’s a lot of world to cover still today.

  23. dumb ox says:

    “as the saints ascend heaven’s stairway and leave the earth in its distress and disarray, there is only one thing left to say…”

    “…and she’s buy-ing the stair-way…to heav-en.

  24. I don’t care how harsh this sounds but Harold Camping is a false teacher. He’s likely unsaved too. He’s a deceiver and other Christian leaders need to expose him as a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

    Obviously he did not read carefully what our Lord said in Matthew 24:36.

    • Bledsoe says:

      If only there were SOME WAY of disproving his wild theory. (Scratches head.)

  25. Of course, there’s the possibility that May 21, 2011 will go the way of October 22, 1844, when William Miller made the same elaboarte calculations to do the same prediction back then, and ended up with what history calls the Great Disappointment.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Disappointment

    • Headless Unicorn Guy says:

      Well, it’s Sunday and the Campingites are now in the middle of their Great Disappointment…

  26. We can make jokes or cringe at the way these folks are using the Bible, but sometime in days or months to come, many of Camping’s followers are going to be despondent. We all realize many of these people are going to feel empty and will lose their faith. Some will hurt themselves or others. There will be some suicides.

    Is there any way to reach out to them?