August 26, 2005 by iMonk
The following correspondence fell into the hands of the Internet Monk Research Department through a fortuitous series of events that cannot be detailed here, due to the need to keep certain parties anonymous while undercover. Let it be sufficient to say that when one has engaged the right people in a poker game, poured the right drinks and employed the correct hospitality staff, one can learn enormously interesting things. While the Internet Monk has long suspected that the following scenario was true, recent intercepts and published materials have confirmed his theory.
This article from a religious newspaper was found in the same folder. Reading it will be helpful in understanding what has been uncovered.
We are stunned. Read at your own risk.
[Continue reading]
August 25, 2005 by iMonk
I recently solicited pieces on Pat Robertson’s “Chavez Assassination Plot.” Here’s a humorous take by BHT fellow Joel Hunter
NSA Chief Phelps: the following transmission was intercepted and translated by our field operative in Virginia Beach
[Continue reading]
August 25, 2005 by iMonk
I recently solicited pieces on Pat Robertson’s “Chavez Assassination Plot” from my audience. I’ll be reprinting a couple of them here.
This is by BHT lurker Isaac Bradshaw
Dear Pat,
It’s been an interesting couple of years for you. You, and your organization, are largely credited for the Republican victory in the Presidential election in 2004. It’s what you’ve always wanted, isn’t it? It’s Hyman Roth to Michael Corleone in Godfather II. It’s what we’ve always dreamed of; a completely sympathetic government! Heady days, Pat. Heady days.
I’m a young’n, but I remember you running for President back in ‘88, even going so far as winning the Iowa caucus. You didn’t go much further than that, because, on national TV, you declared that you talked to God.
[Continue reading]
August 23, 2005 by iMonk
It is difficult to overestimate the extent to which American evangelicals at the beginning of the twenty-first century are fearfully obsessed with homosexuality . No single social or cultural topic other than abortion has engendered such a concentration of evangelical pronouncements, explanations, entrenchments, offensives, conspiracies, ministries and nonsense.
[Continue reading]
August 20, 2005 by iMonk
Any resemblance between this essay, and events occurring in my life as a parent of a young adult child is entirely intentional. I have a wonderful wife who helps me to keep thinking and talking when we come to new chapters in our journey as a couple and as a family. As we’re facing good changes where our role as parents has changed from “managers” to spectators, we’ve talked about what kind of parents we want to be, and not be, both now and in the future. Perhaps this will help other middle-aged parents who want the present and the future to be good chapters in life’s story to see a new and good place to enjoy the game.
When I was a young man, my father, who had never taken me to little league or encouraged me in any kind of sport, starting taking me to baseball games. The games were a local “American Legion” league made up of current high schoolers and boys who had just graduated. It was there, as a fan, that I learned to love baseball, but it was there that I also learned to watch the people who surrounded the game, and to learn from them.
Of course, the players on the diamond should always be the focus of attention for any baseball fan, but one of the glories of baseball is that the game is slow, and there is plenty of time to watch people. Various kinds of fans, players, coaches, vendors, passers-by, etc, all become part of the game, and parts of my memories…and my way of thinking about life.
What does any of this have to do with being a parent? Plenty. Be patient; there will be a payoff. First, let’s go to the ballpark; then to the parenting class.
August 13, 2005 by iMonk
Once upon a time, I decided I wanted to be Dr. Michael Spencer. Michael Spencer, Doctor of Ministry (D. Min), actually.
In Southern Baptist culture, the “D.Min” is the everyparson’s doctorate. Two to three years of off campus work under the supervision of a previous D. Min graduate and a seminary faculty member. Occasional stays on campus for short “seminars.” Eventually, you do a research project, write a hundred page paper, and you’re a doctor.
No residential requirements. No languages. No moving away from your church and taking up a full-time student’s life. No oral exams. No required study at another school. No 5-7 years. No, just a lot of muckity-muck, paperwork, reading, hoop-jumping, check-writing, some decent short classes and you get to be “Dr. Spencer.”
[Continue reading]
August 8, 2005 by iMonk
[The following letter is an opportunity to talk to the many Christian young people who feel disapproval from family and church in their pursuit of an artistic vocation. In my experience, many of these young people abandon their Christian faith as they go through rejection and misunderstanding. This letter is an encouragement and some advice regarding staying on the path of following Christ into an artistic vocation.]
Dear Andrew,
So very good to hear from you. I can’t believe that your third year of college is approaching. Time passes so quickly. It only seems a few weeks ago that you were in senior English, writing essays about the elements of literature. Now you are on your way to Chicago for a year studying photography with professionals. All of us are very proud of you, and I am personally honored that you’ve kept in touch.
[Continue reading]
August 1, 2005 by iMonk
At least once a month, someone writes me about their youth minister. What to do…what to do…what to do….with the zealous, sincere, yet wrong-headed young fellow who is about to split the church between the youth who would die for him and the adults who want to kill him.
[Continue reading]
