November 23, 2017

Archives for August 2005

Plan 9 From Lower Space

The following correspondence fell into the hands of the Internet Monk Research Department through a fortuitous series of events that cannot be detailed here, due to the need to keep certain parties anonymous while undercover. Let it be sufficient to say that when one has engaged the right people in a poker game, poured the […]

A Letter to Agent #6

I recently solicited pieces on Pat Robertson’s “Chavez Assassination Plot.” Here’s a humorous take by BHT fellow Joel Hunter NSA Chief Phelps: the following transmission was intercepted and translated by our field operative in Virginia Beach

A Letter to Pat Robertson

I recently solicited pieces on Pat Robertson’s “Chavez Assassination Plot” from my audience. I’ll be reprinting a couple of them here. This is by BHT lurker Isaac Bradshaw Dear Pat, It’s been an interesting couple of years for you. You, and your organization, are largely credited for the Republican victory in the Presidential election in […]

Is Your Boy A Real Man?: Focus On The Family’s Gender Confusion Watch

It is difficult to overestimate the extent to which American evangelicals at the beginning of the twenty-first century are fearfully obsessed with homosexuality . No single social or cultural topic other than abortion has engendered such a concentration of evangelical pronouncements, explanations, entrenchments, offensives, conspiracies, ministries and nonsense.

Finding Our New Seats At The Ball Game: A Baseball Parable for Parents of Young Adults

Any resemblance between this essay, and events occurring in my life as a parent of a young adult child is entirely intentional. I have a wonderful wife who helps me to keep thinking and talking when we come to new chapters in our journey as a couple and as a family. As we’re facing good […]

Big Money For A Little Piece of Paper: My Stupid Regrets and Inexplicable Ambition to Be “Dr. Spencer”

Once upon a time, I decided I wanted to be Dr. Michael Spencer. Michael Spencer, Doctor of Ministry (D. Min), actually. In Southern Baptist culture, the “D.Min” is the everyparson’s doctorate. Two to three years of off campus work under the supervision of a previous D. Min graduate and a seminary faculty member. Occasional stays […]

A Letter To Andrew and Other Young Artists Injured By The Church

[The following letter is an opportunity to talk to the many Christian young people who feel disapproval from family and church in their pursuit of an artistic vocation. In my experience, many of these young people abandon their Christian faith as they go through rejection and misunderstanding. This letter is an encouragement and some advice […]

Five Things That Youth Ministers Need To Hear (and you’re afraid to tell them, so, OK, I’ll do it.)

At least once a month, someone writes me about their youth minister. What to do…what to do…what to do….with the zealous, sincere, yet wrong-headed young fellow who is about to split the church between the youth who would die for him and the adults who want to kill him.