Good morning iMonk community! Pastor Dan is away on a prayer retreat this weekend, so I’m filling in.
And I say, Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow! We made it through Winter Storms Juno and Kari (reports below), now this weekend we’re facing WS Linus here in the Midwest. Where I live we’ll probably only get a few inches of snow, but anything measurable will far exceed the pitiful dustings we’ve had this winter. I am a four seasons kind of guy, and am hoping for something a little more significant. Plus, I’d really like to take my camera out for some winter wonderland shots.
But wherever you are, and whatever the weather, come on, let’s ramble!
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And yes, I am sorry to report that some are making up their own versions of “Christian” songs from this lyric. ‘Cause nothing says “Jesus” better than taking a pop song about a woman’s naughty bits and changing it so that it’s about the Lord. Right? See for yourself . . .
Let’s move on to something only slightly more ludicrous: CBS News reports that plastic surgery for pets is on the rise. That’s right, according to Petplan claims data, U.S. dog owners spent $62 million in 2011 on plastic surgery treatments. And according to the company that makes them, 500,000 male cats and dogs received a new set of “Neuticles” (testicular implants) after having been neutered. Because, you know, Fido and Garfield still want to be playas after the big snip.
To be fair, many of the procedures serve to correct real medical conditions that pet owners didn’t foresee when they purchased the particular breed of dog or cat they chose.
All I know, is that with a product like Neuticles available as a sponsor, there is sure to be a reality show based in Beverly Hills on the horizon.
Hmmm. I won’t say it was a non-event because we did get a foot of snow (I think—there’s bare ground over here and drifts over there) but mostly it was just plain NOISY, cold and drafty, and the living room and dining room windows proved that they’re obsolete (snow between the inner and storm windows). Gusts to hurricane force at times, and an unofficial report of more than 100 mph. We didn’t lose electricity (yet, and I’m optimistic that we won’t) but I had dug the portable generator out of the corner of my shop just in case, and have plenty of gasoline in Grand-Dad’s old outhouse. There’s three feet of snow drifted in front of the outhouse door, but it’s the dry and fluffy stuff so even if Grand-Dad were still alive and had to go, or if I needed the gas, it wouldn’t slow us down much. All boats in the cove are OK because a northeast wind puts them in the lee here at Little Cranberry Island—but the day afterward becomes the real test, when the back side of the storm pulls air out of the Arctic and the boats are more exposed. But, anything in the water in January will be on a pretty stout mooring (mine is 4400 pounds of granite, and I’m serious about having good chain) so it’s rare for anything to go ashore. The last time a lobster boat went adrift was the Ground Hog Day storm of 1976, although summer boats do go adrift on a predictable basis because summer people don’t really know how to handle boats. One little yacht went ashore during the 4th of July hurricane last year, but that was excusable—after all, a maple tree got dumped on my roof the same day. The big event of this storm is yet to be determined—whether Triomphe, the dead 36-foot humpback whale that washed ashore Christmas Day, is still down on the back beach in front of the old Coast Guard Station.
In an update, Ted reports the whale is still there, but the wind moved her down the beach a bit (see picture).
From The Salt and other sources, here are a few food facts for Sunday’s big game:
- Americans will consume 1.25 billion chicken wings while watching.
- 1.25 billion wings weigh 5,955 times more than the combined weight of the Seahawks and Patriots players.
- Americans will consume an estimated 325.5 million gallons of beer on the day.
- With Sunday also being the day the most pizza and tortilla chips are consumed, the average person will consume more than 2,400 calories during the game.
- This Sunday is the second-largest day for consumption of food and drink for Americans, behind Thanksgiving Day.
What are your plans? Is this national holiday one that you observe?